That’s when I received a somewhat unexpected text from my Aunt in Dubai who was working on the 150 foot, teak hulled luxury yacht Ashena.
Knowing that I had always been interested in her lavish yachty lifestyle, she came to me to exchange favors.
“We need someone to come work on the boat in dubai. But we need you by next Friday. You in?”
Those may not have been the exact words but it’s the gist of the text.
Without a thought of what my family, friends or (casual) boyfriend at the time would think, I typed back: “I’m in!”
I called my boyfriend, so excited I was shaking and my voice was cracking. He thought something was wrong. And it probably was—for him. He was not happy but unfortunately I didn’t care as much as I thought I would and in the end convinced him it would be Ok if I left. That was probably the foreshadowing on how our relationship was going to turn out.
I called my mom, she too knew something was up and knew exactly what it was by the tone of my voice. She was concerned about my relationship with my boyfriend and pondered out loud whether or not I was going to be single for the rest of my life. I told her my views were still unchanged on my goal of having a normal family life... when I was a little older.
As I walked to the registrations office I sent one last text to my aunt, sealing my fate: “OK, I’m about to quit all my courses, I need to know for sure I will be on a plane to Dubai next week!”
Her reply pushed me through the door where I dropped 5 courses and officially became a college drop-out. I knew I would regret it at some point, but this was a chance of a life-time, I could always go back.
I knew then that my relationship was over, but I was too much of a chicken to admit it at the time. I could have saved a lot of heart-ache for alot of people--especially him, if I had just ended it before I left.
The next week I stepped off the plane in Dubai. It was late at night but the air still held the humidity like a sauna. My skin grabbed the water from the air and held it just as tightly. I had never felt a heat like this before, and it was WINTER!
I spent 7 months in Dubai, partying, shopping and breaking hearts; some on more than one occasion. I learnt the very loose ropes of yachting and that long distance relationships don’t work, this also proved to be true with the boyfriend that I held on to once I left Dubai and yachting all together.
Apparently, not working in the same industry qualifies as being “long distant” as well. We lived in the same city and his neglect that I tried to hide behind his charm was enough to kiss two other guys.
I spent a few months back home learning that I would rather be back yachting. And that I would rather indulge in a meaningless affair than be with my boyfriend’s less than frequent online charm. I realized then that any straying had to stop in this relationship and any future ones. I was playing with Karma and I knew if I didn't stop, it would come back around.
Being unhappy at my job at the bank, I made the decision and wrote my aunt an email stating that I was going to go get the qualification I needed, the STCW and start looking for a job yachting again. I also asked that if she knew of anything, or had anything on the boat she was now on, if she could help me out. My aunt, being in the industry for over 15 years was a huge help to my yachting career.
She emailed back that she did have something on her boat, Intuition II, and the sooner I could get my course finished the better. I gave my month’s notice to the bank I was working at and waited my last month out.
February 2nd 2008 I flew to Ft. Lauderdale, Florida to get my STCW certificate in fire fighting, first aid and sea survival. Then 8 days later I was on a plane to Antigua to meet the boat. I had been told of the people on board; what they were like. I was told of Adam and how he was cute and my age. Me and my relationship as I knew it were doomed already at the thought of a cute boy living and working in my new home. How convenient!
When I arrived, my aunt and I went for a drink and she showed me pictures of the crew on her camera. “Oh here’s Adam, the Texan.”
I took one look and thought “Oh No.” But I said “Hmmm.” And I think I commented on how he looked like some actor from Karate kids or something. I don’t remember what I said because I was too busy thinking “I’m doomed! I already know I’m going to be with him! My relationship will be over soon!”
I spent two weeks in agony I have never felt so nervous around someone and probably looked like a totally idiot, blushing all the time, fumbling and tripping over my words. I’d sit outside and read and he’d come out for a smoke and we’d chat for awhile, or rather he’d chat and I’d drool and ask stupid questions like “do you like Texas? Have you ever been to Canada?” The whole while I’d be thinking ‘He probably has a girlfriend’ or ‘he doesn’t have ANY interest in me AT all!’ I would try and find flaws in the way he looked so I wouldn’t be attracted to him so intensly. Even reminding myself, or calling my boyfriend didn’t help.
Finally two weeks later, the fateful drunk kiss happened and it was all over, my knees didn’t shake around him, my heart still beat just as fast, but that was just the love talking I think. After that I was more comfortable than ever around him.
We hid our relationship from everyone until April when I broke-up with my boyfriend. We watched movies together at night and had sleepovers. It was perfect! Even despite living, working and sleeping together in a smaller than average bed, we made it work. I was pleasantly surprised on how easy it was.
A year later we left Intuition and 2 months after that we started looking for work again. We were told by the agent that there was no chance we would get a job together. We walked out of her office shattered but with a string of hope holding the pieces together. Somehow I was fine. I thought, “OK, well maybe we’re just not meant to be together” I didn’t believe it myself and I know that’s a harsh statement to make right off the bat, but like I said; long distance relationships (at least ones with an unknown result to them) don’t work.
We sat down, I was calm until Adam started talking about how he still wanted to make it work. Even if we were on different boats. He didn’t want to break-up. Obviously neither did I and I felt so ashamed to have the thoughts I did and yet so relieved he didn’t have the same thoughts.
That’s when I broke down and started crying. We decided to wait a month before we started looking separately. That was my glimmer of hope sparkling in the distance.
Within two weeks luck stuck us in the ass and we had a job together on Athena, a boat that Adam was lusting over and that we visited almost daily to take in the length of her and the height of her huge 3 masts.
Its been 4 months of trying to live together in the confines of a cabin smaller than my parents bathroom. Despite being in each other’s face literally and metaphorically, we still make it work perfectly.
Recently Adam volunteered to help our sister boat, that night I realized why my dad would track my flights and travels via the internet-- and it wasn't because he was bored. I found myself trying to track the sister boat online and getting frustrated when I couldn’t. It’s just plain love for that other person. Wanting to seem close no matter how far the distance and It’s amazing how a little distance can you bring you so much closer.
